The Queen’s Speech - Rights For Separated Fathers Finally Get A Look In.

The importance of fathers is finally being recognised and was highlighted In Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II’s speech on 9^th May 2012.  It was revealed that a consultation will take place which could radically reform the law governing children to enable both separated parents an equal caring arrangement with their children.

As (perhaps through personal experience) you may be aware, under our current legislation, as set out in the provisions of The Children Act 1989, Judges and Magistrates must consider the independent views provided by CAFCASS (Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service) when being asked to decide where children should live after their parents’ have separated and how often children should see the non-resident parent. The order which is made by the Court is considered as a decision which has been made in the “best interests” of the child.  The welfare principle, incorporating considerations of the children’s physical, emotional and educational needs are applied when coming to this decision.  However, unless the mother can be shown to be an alcoholic, drug addict or suffering from a psychotic mental condition, I can tell you, that the chances of attaining shared residence, are minimal at best.  The mother is almost always considered to be best placed to look after the children, with the father getting the odd weekend and some holiday contact (if he’s that lucky).

It has always been considered that the mother, even if she is a working parent, is best placed to look after the children.  I have always found this to be most antagonising when representing a hard working father, who works all the hours he can for the sake of his children, who then may only spend one hour each evening with them – but that one hour is so precious: this one hour is the quality time that both children and father crave and need.  That one hour, where the entire day’s stress and strain is forgotten about by the father, and where the children excitedly recite the day’s events at school.  This is simply a snapshot of the relationship and bond between a father and his children.  The weekend brings more time: walks in the park, bike rides, barbecues, and just general ‘together time’, which serves to cement the bond between father and child.   

I have yet to see a case, where after a couple separates, the father has been able to retain any semblance of contact, even remotely close to the time that he shared with his children before separation. 

Don’t get me wrong, I am not blaming the mothers here and in cases, where the mothers are the main breadwinners, I am sure that the same situation arises with them.  However, I am more concerned about cases where both parties are working parents.  Even here, the mother is seen to be the main carer, in spite of the children’s ages and sex.  The Court, for all its welfare principles and children’s interests, has always been inclined to side towards the mother.

Divorce and Separation are hard for the parties and the children: emotionally and financially.  But as a devoted father, knowing that the odds are stacked against you as far as your children are concerned, is the most difficult fact to bear.  So many heart wrenching stories have been reported of distraught fathers and their desperate actions following separation.  These actions, certainly cannot be condoned, but are in most instances, the actions of fathers having fallen in to severe depression, fallen in to a deep deep emotional black hole, from which they can find no way out.

Are things about to change?

The current proposals start with an automatic principle of shared care – this is basically a flip of the current situation: now we start from a position of equality and then it is up to both parties to present submissions as to why this is not a good idea.

As always, there has been a lot of criticism of the proposals, with many lawyers even arguing that the current practice and procedure is more than sufficient and therefore there is no real need for this new Bill.  I would stick my neck out and disagree.

The current procedures are needed and essential to assess the interests of the children.  But in practice, the Courts veered towards the mother in their interpretation of the legislation and the fathers would always start from the back foot.  By introducing a shared care arrangement, fathers are ensured that they would be starting off from an equal position.  The Courts would still need to apply the welfare principle, but if the Bill passes through in to legislation, it will no longer be possible to simply push fathers to one side..

I’ll keep you updated as this develops through Parliament, but for now, to all you fathers out there struggling for contact with your children, please keep pushing for contact. Things will get better.